Just a note,

obviously my sentences are lacking in structure and have no grammar and trail off or never finish or pop up in the middle of things BUT this is just a working space for me, not something highly polished :)

Sunday, March 15, 2009

writings from manapouri


I once spent $320 on a pair of boots. Leather of course because it lasts and it means QUALITY. They broke three times and have a hole in the toe. I can't wear them anymore, I'm not that keen on wearing someone or something elses skin on top of my own. I did a project on tattoos earlier in 2008, peoples opinions on skin are wonderful, the permanence of tattoos (permanence?) people aren't permanent. Its pretty precious to have that mind set. We all love our skin in different ways, we need it to live, to experience the world, to touch; it defines us.
Race-colour-tattoos
Tattoos are bad, so are piercings. So abnormal and SO extreme. Watching the body modification DVD i could not believe the breast implants and face lifts, yet somehow these are acceptable, 'normal' because they fit the standard beauty ideal, they 'enhance'. Tattos are beautiful and personal to their owners, they are unique. Breast implants. well.... they're tits.

I can't believe i own leather boots, or that i was proud of them, polished them, conditioned them, whatever.

On my own skin: It's nice. I have scars on my arms, neck, and chest mainly from burns. They don't worry me and I don't dee a need to change them or hide them. I like having my skin, i wouldn'twant anyone else walking around in it, not that they would want to you would assume.

I want to fix my precious boots, patch up the hole in the toe just to make them whole. I'm not throwing them away, giving them to anyone or selling them i don't see any point in that and it makes no statement whatsoever rather it ignores something very important, a change in ideals that has taken place. I feel that I should try to give something back after taking so much, always taking indirectly to avoid guilt and blame.

I will talk to some tattooists around auckland to see if anyone does scarification, also to a tanner or someone that works with leather products to find out what sort of process is involved. I want to get a small section cut out of my toe, cured and tanned then sewn onto my boot to fix the hole. My boots already disgust me and i am unsure how I would feel about them after doing this.

On Tattoos
I thought about getting one to mark a big change in my life, outwardly altering my body to let people know about it. This is a very personal project, i want to say that in doing this that the work is just for me but it can't be. I'm not hurting or pressuring anybody else, i think i will just show them what i have done and see what they think. People are so stupid. I expect people to be repulsed (if they thought hair was gross see this...)

ummmm, why?
I'm doing this to show that I strongly believe in something. I want to explore the term 'activism' and what this means in the way that i relate to people through my artwork. It's not a huge statement when you look at some of the people on BMEZine, it's pretty weak actually. One small piece of skin when I ate the flesh of other animals for twenty years, and the wound will heal. I'm in two minds about who this work is for, the process and action is for me, the result is for them.

DOCUMENTATION
I loathe it. A lot of the time i see no point in it but i guess it is necessary when you are at school. In this case however i will thoroughly document the process because it is so important, even the simple things like cleansing my skin and looking after it. Recording audio as well as images will allow a wide variety of combinations when putting the work together, it could possibly be quite performative.
HUMANE

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